The Spiritual Journey
This is the story of my spiritual journey over the past few years. I've learned a great deal as I navigate this adventure in life. My upbringing and culture have shaped me in such a way that the idea of living in a van and wandering the earth in search of spiritual fulfillment was never really something I would consider doing.
Blog Entry 1 * 4-15-22
This part of my journey came a while into my travels, and it seemed as good a place as any to begin. My life was simple, and my van was a modest minivan with a bed in the back. The first stop was about earning some gas money through side jobs while also exploring my relationship with God. In this journal, I’ll be using Radha and Krishna interchangeably with God. Radha and Krishna are Hindu deities I feel a deep connection with when meditating and practicing devotion. I’d love to say that my decisions were inspired by wisdom and sound judgment, and that I wasn’t making poor choices at this first stop, but the reality is far from that. I had spent time with friends who are very particular about clean associations, clean food, and maintaining pure energy. I found myself questioning whether I was building a genuine relationship with Krishna (God) that could go with me anywhere, no matter what I was doing. If not, I wondered if I should reconsider everything. In meditation, Krishna seemed to think my concerns were a bit misplaced, but he was so patient with me, humoring my doubts and setting up an opportunity for me to serve him. Serving God means feeling compelled to speak to someone on his behalf, to share the message they need to hear. It’s incredible how God knows exactly what every spirit soul needs in their heart of hearts. So, despite my clean-energy friends probably advising against it, I signed up for a job at a casino. I knew it might not be the best choice in their eyes, but I needed to be sure that God, especially Krishna, would be with me, no matter where I went or what I did. I needed to know that his presence was real, everywhere. The experiences I had at the casino were fascinating. I met so many new people from all walks of life. Despite the rough energy of the environment, I felt protected in my own bubble of Krishna’s energy. He created space for me to explore this world and feel safe throughout my time there. Exploring the basement passageways, staff areas, and seeing what goes into running such a place was eye-opening. What amazed me most was that I never felt weighed down or negatively affected by the energy around me. Krishna’s service had led me there, and he showed me that I would be safe no matter where he sent me. My seva (service) at the casino led me to a coworker while we were cleaning hotel rooms in a large high-rise. This coworker had gotten tangled in some heavy situations, influenced by the casino environment, and was troubled by some things they had done. They feared that God no longer loved them because of it. I sensed that much of their fear came from a faith rooted in black magic, which I imagined might be unforgiving. Krishna wanted me to reassure them that God’s love is unconditional, no matter what. It was a beautiful moment to remind them that God would always love them, no matter their actions. I also mentioned that while they would have to face the consequences of their karma someday, God's love would always be with them. When I shared this story with someone else, they commented that it didn’t seem like much, given that God loves everyone. But the truth is, when you're stuck in darkness, when all you have left is the assurance that you are loved by God, it means everything. That love, in its depth and purity, is the most important thing we can hold onto. Another important lesson I learned is that when you ask for seva (service) in a setting that doesn’t feel like your natural place, environment, or crowd, it can still be done. However, when God creates the seva, it’s always aligned with the purpose for which you were sent there. In my case, it was to talk to a coworker who was afraid they would suffer without God’s love after this lifetime. While I was there, the lower vibrational energy of the place didn’t affect me, but I realized that it was a limited window of time to complete my seva. As I finished the seva, that window of time and safety began to close—it was a flow. If I had chosen to do anything beyond the seva in that setting, the outcome and my experience would have been completely different. I realized how important it is to "stay in your lane" when doing work for God, remaining detached from the outcome. It's also essential not to become a "freedom fighter" in a place that is karmically designed to serve its own purpose.
Youtube video link for this blog entry: https://youtu.be/CyYZeSmJDhc